Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Ho, Ho, Ho

Some people deck the halls, hang the mistletoe, and decorate the tree. I, on the other hand, head to eBay and sell my ugly inherited Christmas sweaters. I obtain my groceries in a timely manner so I don't have to leave the house for the next two weeks. I grab every anti-viral herb and supplement my health food store has to offer, because Hayden's school district is giving the swine flu mist to any child whose parents agree (the mist is a live virus and is contageous). I'm not cooking, I'm not gifting (except for Hayden), I'm not caroling, and I may or may not send out festive Christmas cards.

Have a happy holiday season.

I don't particularly care if you've been naughty or nice
Posted by at

4 comments:

  1. Have you read the whole book of these Holiday cards? They are freaking hilarious! If not, you totally should. I was reading them in the kiddie section of Barnes and Noble the other day and all the kids looked at me like I was crazy since I was crying laughing. haha

    On a serious note, a bunch of kids at Gabe's school got the nasal spray and he has managed to avoid it from them and also when I had it last month. I guess all of my money I piss away on supplements for him is finally paying off! Not such a bad deal after all. :)
    Happy Holidays!

    ReplyDelete

  2. I'm going to buy Ben the entire Thomas the Train DVD collection, every Thomas toy there is, going to get that gray Lexus and park it in the snow covered yard with a big red bow on top, hand Erica a sparkling diamond ring, invite the neighbors over for cocktails and grill some steaks and fly in a few friends for New Years to watch the ball games on my 92 inch plasma screen digital, surround sound teeeveee. I might even drink too much champagne and sleep for 12 hours.

    Oh wait, those were my thoughts this morning as I lay in bed at 4AM wondering if I could get away with dressing up like Santa and robbing some bank of a million dollars in TARP money and putting it to work stimulating my so-frickin depressed emotional economy.

    Maybe I need to go to the grocery and stock up for a two week long hibernation too!

    ReplyDelete

  3. Is this your tradition, or just a first time thing to see how it works out? LOL

    ReplyDelete

  4. bensmyson, you crack me up. lol. Not a bad holiday tradition. :)

    I'll have to read the entire book of those cards. I love sarcasm. :)

    ReplyDelete

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)